


Flying High

by goodisrelative



Category: Castle
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-21
Updated: 2009-12-21
Packaged: 2017-10-04 21:59:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/34543
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goodisrelative/pseuds/goodisrelative
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Right now it was a perfect fall day and she wanted the memories of the past to stay.  So she called out as she walked down the stairs, "Dad!  Let's go to the park!"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Flying High

Alexis' trip down memory lane started when she called Kate Beckett for advice. Alexis realized later how similar and how very different her upbringing was to Kate's. Kate had been raised by her father. For more of her life than not, it had been Kate and her dad against the world. That Alexis could relate to.

Where their worlds diverged greatly was in the reasons why they'd grown up with just their fathers. Kate's mom had been murdered. Kate then spent her life trying to save her dad from alcohol. Alexis knew this because she'd overheard conversations between her dad and Kate and because, later, Kate had told her more details. Details Alexis did not share with her father.

Alexis, on the other hand, had been raised by her dad because he'd wanted to give her that normal childhood he'd never had and her mom never could provide. And she loved him so much for it. Grams had come in later, adding a strange dimension that worked perfectly for their off-beat, dramatic little family.

Alexis loved her mom, but she loved her mom best when a continent separated them. Alexis craved the normal her father tried valiantly to provide. She took pride in being the normal one of the family, and her mom didn't – and wouldn't – understand that shopping in Paris wasn't a reason to miss school in Alexis' eyes.

Alexis remembered her times with her father best. Her mom blew in and out of her life like the wind as she moved from acting job to acting job. But, Alexis could always count on her dad. She still cherished the afternoons in the park after school and during the summers here in New York. He'd been the one to push her higher whenever she demanded, laughing merrily when he complied. He'd been the one there to hear her screams of joy when they played on the teeter-totter and he'd kept her high in the air until she'd given him the magic password to come down again.

He'd never missed one of her recitals, concerts, or debates. No matter his schedule with book signings and movie premiers, he always made it back. She'd been mortified when he stood up and called her name, yelling, "That's my daughter!" at her first violin concert solo. But she'd never trade it or the white roses he always gave her after.

Alexis knew that her relationship with her father baffled all of her friends, and her teachers as well. He'd never missed a parent-teacher conference in her entire life. The teachers were always amazed when he showed up on time, mostly, and ready to hear everything about her. They were too used to parents canceling or sending the nanny. Her friends could not understand how she thought of her father as her best friend and was never, ever afraid to tell him anything.

Okay, that was changing now, she'd admit. She tried to keep the names of the boys she liked away from him because she knew he'd try to run them or at least have Esposito or Ryan run them. Alexis knew Kate would always tell him no, in no uncertain terms – Alexis had heard her before. But she was pretty sure Kate ran them anyway, although probably never told her dad.

Alexis loved her father. She was growing up and didn't need him like she'd had before. Her dating was a challenge for him because suddenly he wasn't the only man in her life. What he saw working with Kate and her team made him scared at times, because he couldn't ignore what happened in the big bad city. Which was why she wouldn't let him control everything, but she'd let him win some things and help him see that because of how he raised her, she'd be okay.

She knew, without a doubt, that her saying she was thinking about Cambridge as a college had really freaked him out. It was, actually, one of her top choices right now, even if she had thrown it out there to see his reaction. She loved her music, but wasn't sure a degree in it was the way she wanted her life to go. She knew this summer was going to be a test for them both. She wanted to go traveling to look at schools.

Alexis wondered if she could survive a few months with her mom – it would be a test to see if she could survive away from her father. As serious and normal as Alexis was, she loved her crazy father and their impromptu battles of laser tag, midnight talks over ice cream sundaes, and just the ability to watch him working in his office – him knowing she was there, but waiting for her to break the silence, always accepting those few times she didn't.

But college was still in the future, and so was summer. Right now it was a perfect fall day and she wanted the memories of the past for just a bit longer. So she called out as she walked down the stairs, "Dad! Let's go to the park!"

***

Rick watched his daughter walk down the stairs and saw the memories reflected in her eyes. He couldn't say what made her think about the past, or what made her want to relive some of his favorite times with her. But he knew the rare opportunity she was offering and took it without hesitation. Beckett and he'd just closed a case where a sixteen-year-old girl had been kidnapped, raped and murdered. Alexis' face haunted him as the dead girl. He needed this time with his daughter to banish those thoughts. Plus, after all, it was a day in the park with the young woman he loved with all his heart.

Rick smiled when she asked him to push her and right then he was transported back. Alexis had loved the swings and teeter-totter. They'd spent hours playing on them. Her squealing in delight as he pushed her small form higher and higher. He remembered the first time they'd gone and she demanded to go higher. He'd never been so scared in his life. And Alexis had screamed and cried until he pushed her higher. He remembered the grey-haired older woman that came over and reassured him. _"It's okay, son. She won't fall. She's a strong child who you've taught well to hold on. You can't hold them safe forever. Sometimes the best way to hold them safe is to let them fly."_

The woman's name was Katherine, he learned later. He was to call her Kat, and Alexis called her GramKat. She'd helped him learn how to hold on and let Alexis fly on her own. He still heard her words and advice to this day. It had hurt them both when she died a few years ago.

Kat had been the one to find Alexis the one time she'd run off. He'd been frantic; screaming her name, almost running in circles around the playground, scared to death she was gone or dead. He never could figure out which would be worse. She'd been mad at him because he'd told her they couldn't come back the next day. Someone – one of the regular mothers – had called his name, taking his attention for ten seconds at most and she was gone. While he'd been running around, he'd envisioned killing her for scaring him so. But when Kat had brought the child, arm firmly in Kat's hand, back to him, all he could do was sink to his knees and hold her tightly.

_"What do you say to your father, Alexis?" Kat's voice was firm and unyielding._

"I'm sorry I ran off, daddy. I didn't mean to make you scared. I just wanted…"

"I know, sweetheart. Just because you wanted to play here tomorrow, doesn't mean you can run off to get your way."

Alexis had never done it again. It had taken him a week to let her out of his sight. And even then, she didn't want to be far from him. She'd never seen her dad so scared and she didn't want to cause that ever again.

Rick stood behind her, pushing her higher, and he knew it was coming time again. Boys and college and everything the future held. She wouldn't be with him much longer and he wasn't sure how he was going to survive that. But, he could hear Kat again. _"Sometimes the best way to hold them tight is to let them fly, trusting in them and you that you've taught them well. She's daddy's little girl, Rick. She'll always come back to you."_

"I'm not going to get everything right, sweetheart. I'm going to make you mad and hurt you. Just remember that I am trying. Letting you go is the hardest thing in the world," he whispered, as she flew higher on the swing.


End file.
